A TRUE STORY ABOUT GETTING DRUNK

This article is about Alcohol and the effects it has on the male teenage brain. It may get quite graphic so if you are of a sensitive disposition, please read on.

I only remember the beginning of this story and it’s subsequent aftermath. The bit in the middle was given to me by various third parties with whom I was at school with when it all happened.

My old school was a boarding school, a fine English public school (the sort where you pay to be educated) One of the perks we had was being allowed out of school bounds at weekends to go into the local town and socialise. In other words get drunk. It was around Mid October and an acquaintance  was celebrating his birthday and wanted to do something special to mark this happy day. It being a Saturday, and boring it was decided the best thing would be to go Midsomer N (The local town) and get drunk. Just like most weekends actually, Bath being the other option.  there were four of us the birthday boy who shall be referred to as B. A Spanish guy called M  and then there was C.  Another person declined, he said at the time he thought something awful would happen. He was right.

This is the point where the story becomes unclear. All I know we bought the drink and went out on top of the old slag heap. I remember a bottle of Coconut and Rum based drink in a white bottle. A bottle of nice Red I had pinched from my Dads wine cellar. I still have a morbid dislike of Coconut’s and their odour to this day. The Bottle of Red was Spanish and probably quite expensive. There would have been other drink as well. Most likely Whisky and Beer.

I do know we sang Happy Birthday as per tradition, we also sang it in French, though probably not very well. With writing My memories of this day seem to be coming back to me. Maybe there is a healing taking place here. I always recall C as being squeamish, it was not hard to make him gag and I do recall wanting to go toilet, I squatted behind a tree and probably used Pine needles. (gross, but necessary) The next bit? The turd was impaled on a stick and I chased my fellows around the summit of the heap. C went Green and gagged and the toilet got spread around a bit. I ought to mention here that my sense of humour can be somewhat inappropriate. Or at least used to be, it’s nice to think I have grown up a little bit since then.

I seem to recall some of the locals and their motorbike and C attempting to ride it. Something about loosing the clutch handle that rendered the thing useless and the owners being annoyed. This is what I recall and partly what was said to me later.

I do not remember running down the side of the heap and pulling a moony at a couple of Policemen. If you do not know what a moony is, it is the exposing of ones naked backside to some unsuspecting individuals or group of people. I guess choosing a pair of coppers was a bad idea. As was vomiting on their boots,  the same could be said for telling one or both of them to. “Fuck off Pork.” When they tried to pick me up.

According to the other witnesses the police wanted to take me in or at least back to the school, which being very noble and proper minded would probably have resulted in all sorts of bother. Anyway the offer was declined reasons being it would cause all manner of trouble, expulsions and that sort of thing. I would like to apologise at this point to A, M and C for the trouble this adventure must have caused. I have no idea how they got me home, but I did hear the  driver refused to take the unconscious, vomit covered public school boy, on his bus. So I guess they must have dragged/ carried me back ‘home.’ A distance of about 3 miles, it must have been nightmarish.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A ROOM WITH A VIEW AND LOTS OF BOOKS

I have no idea of what to write about.  So I am going to write about something.

These last few days have been quite hectic, Hyper-ventilation, nervousness, anxiety a whole host of different things and feelings. And quite a lot of running around too. I have finally moved the desk/office up the stairs to the library where I can look out the window at the garden and be surrounded by books. It is more peaceful up here, the cats have found the bean bag and are fast alseep. It makes a change to have at least one of them using the desk as it’s roosting place. I know Cats don’t roost,but this one might as well.

All the art stuff is now on a big trestle table downstairs and I do not care if it gets covered in paint, in fact I am looking forward to that. If we have guests,I can throw a table cloth over it  and nobody will be none the wiser. career wise, the job centre seem to agree that it is pointless me looking for work I detest or am going to get pissed off with after 3 weeks. They want me to focus on what I like. I love and enjoy. Art, books, history and Alcohol, Actually I do not want to involve myself in Alcohol. (Apart from drinking it) Did I mention painting.  cause all I really want to do apart from learning and studying is to paint. Perhaps learning more on the rules of punctuation would help as well.

There are lots of new idea’s bustling around in my head, waiting to get out. I am looking forward to showing some on here as and when they materialise. I would love to write more, but really do have to look for work now.

I was looking for a job and I lost a job.

And heaven knows I am not miserable now.  (Apologies to Morrissey)

Did I mention, I do not have a job anymore? It is nothing unusual, the workplace and I do not seem to get along very well. Indeed the longest time I have held a job down for is a little over two years. At a rough reckoning I would say the average length of time between starting and finishing is 3-4 months.  The longer lasting ones push the average up, the rest of them, bring it back down. I am best off being self employed, be my own manager. That way I can hardly sack myself, if I were to do so, I could be reinstated the next morning, or the same day. Who knows?

I am done with food, making it,selling it or having anything to do with it. (Apart from  eating it) and  most things retail can F**K OFF.  I am considering sales (of what) and want to be an artist.  I can honestly say not much else interests me. Give me something creative and worthwhile to do, a decent salary would help.

Not being in work, provides me with lots more time to study and paint. This I have to say is the best thing about being ‘unemployed’

Triphammer falls, NY state USA
Oils on paper 2019-2020
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OIl on paper 2020. Model unknown

 

 

 

Work and that

So yet another year has passed, and for that matter so has  another job/employer. This time over signing a piece of paper. It would seem’s  my happy little brain is not very good at remembering such things. Never mind the place was badly run when I started there back last October and from there it has just got worse. Where else, would you find clothing and books ending up in the fridge next to the Yogurt and Cheese?

I feel half tempted  to mention the name of the place here,but shall content myself with saying Heyford Hill. Make of it what you will.

Happier news now, I am having a spurt of growth in the creative department, and am pressing ahead with making some business out of it all. I am, if you have been visiting here regularly have realised by now I am not very good at holding down employment. Well I can barely sack myself,  can I?

I don’t want to post anything art wise on this post, this does not mean I have been lazy. Far from it, I have simply played around with camera’s enough for one day and am feeling hungry, it is after all lunch time.

Instead I thought I would share a photo my best friend/Fiance took of me a couple of day ago. We aim to get all three of the cats involved at some point.

 

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BTW Jessica is my real name, and any idea’s of my being trans should not be entertained. I just happen to enjoy wearing women’s clothes.